Random Ramblings

I need to stop spending money. Hi… so, yeah, life is good at the moment, I’m in a perpetual state of “what the fuck is going on” but life is good… One moment to the next it is different. Physically I’m fine, emotionally I’m a little imbalanced but its nothing I haven’t felt before and got thru it. Although I do seem to always feel on the edge of the precipice sometimes called a panic attack – I seem to be able to push myself back from the edge when it seems to get too close. One day I might hurl myself off the edge, but for the time being I think I’m safe.

University looms larger and larger every day, as does the fact (which I’m trying not to think about) that I’m going to be a student very soon – you might think they’re the same issue, but University excites me… however being a student is a scary prospect, not the least of the issues being financial. It will be interesting to be going to school with a bunch of kids that are literally most of them at least 10 years younger than me. I’m obviously hopeful that as seems to be the trend these days, there will be several mature aged students doing the same thing as me, but I have to think that the numbers will be small.

I also think of the palm reader who I met in New Orleans who said I would have 2 great loves, the second of whom I would meet while studying. I am assuming the first was my ex-wife… whom I loved… most of the time… well… some of the time... Occasionally at least… I thought I had loved since… but to be truthful I don’t think I’ve been truly in Love… its hard to compare an 8 year relationship to something like what I’ve had since… ranging from a 6 month long distance relationship, to several that have lasted less than a month. Although I AM proud to say, none that have only lasted over-night. But back to my point – and not to make too much of it, but I didn’t tell him I was going back to school, and that I’d been married… it was interesting that he said those things. He also said I’d have 4 kids and live into my 90s… neither of which at this point of my life necessarily appeal to me greatly. Although I’m sure when the time comes… yeah. You know what I mean. Maybe.

So yeah, anyway, my second great love is apparently waiting for me at Uni. But it IS a 5 year course, who knows when it will be.

In other more exciting news, I just had a hair-cut.

I guess since I Last wrote – god knows how long ago that was… I have had a promotion at work… I’m now bar supervisor/head barman… what that means literally is a bit more money in my pocket every week – although now I’m “seeing” someone (I think… it’s complicated) that money seems to be going just as fast as before, if not faster. No more… it needs to go into the bank. I know I can do it… and she’s not needy or wanty, so it should be fine. Plus she’s in the same boat financially and will understand my need to save money.

So in that respect the new manager at work has been great. As in all respects actually. She’s great. She’s actually asked me to stay and go to Uni here, offered me free accommodation and everything… hard to pass up an offer like that, apart from the fact that the course here – I’m pretty sure – is 7 years instead of 5… the cost of living is ridiculous… something that can’t be alleviated by free rent (although it would go along way to helping) and I do really like the girl I’m seeing at the moment… I can’t do it… I don’t know if I’ll regret this decision down the track… I really don’t… which makes me afraid that it might be the wrong one… but I think I want to go to Uni in Adelaide. I think.

What else has happened?? I bought a leather jacket… which is cool…

I went and saw the Stage performance of Wicked yesterday… that was amazing… the girl with the lead part had an AMAZING voice… absolutely breathtaking, skin tingling voice… but the story was Way different from the book… not bad different, just very simplified obviously… its hard to sing a story without taking some fairly hefty artistic licenses… you need to make things rhyme for god’s sake… that’s not the easiest thing in the world… if life was a musical (heaven forbid) everything would have to rhyme all the time, it would suck.

Oh, and I should have internet at home soon… which will also be cool. Although I think that maybe my webcam is broken, which sucks… but we’ll see.

Anyway, I think that’s about it… no promises, but I’ll try to write soon.

Just because your voice reaches halfway around the world doesn't mean you are wiser than when it reached only to the end of the bar.
- Edward R. Murrow